Tag: jokes
member name: ~*~Nina~*~ R.
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January 17, 2008 02:07 PM EST --
Two doctors and an HMO manager died and lined up at the pearly gates for admission to heaven. St. Peter asked them to identify themselves.
One doctor stepped forward and said, "I was a pediatric . . . more
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April 06, 2008 08:51 AM EDT --
There's this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I'll . . . more
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February 11, 2008 11:01 AM EST --
A poor man walking in the forest feels close enough to God toask, "God, what is a million years to you?"
God replies, "My son, a million years to you is like asecond to . . . more
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February 11, 2008 11:28 AM EST --
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you . . . more
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February 12, 2008 12:29 PM EST --
Drunken Confession
A drunken man staggered in to a Catholic church and sat down in aconfession box, saying nothing.
The bewildered priest coughed to attract his attention, . . . more
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February 20, 2008 10:09 AM EST --
An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies wafting up the stairs.He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself . . . more
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February 20, 2008 10:21 AM EST --
Two elderly, excited Southern women were sitting together in the front pew of church listening to a fiery preacher.
When this preacher condemned the sin of stealing, these two ladies . . . more
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February 20, 2008 09:30 PM EST --
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, . . . more
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February 21, 2008 02:53 AM EST --
Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made anote, "Take only one, God is watching." . . . more
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February 22, 2008 02:06 PM EST --
The new preacher had just begun his sermon. He was a little nervous, and about ten minutes into the sermon his mind went blank. After a brief second of complete panic, he remembered what they had taught . . . more
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February 25, 2008 06:19 AM EST --
In Sunday school, they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially interested when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. . . . more
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February 26, 2008 12:17 PM EST --
Only in America…do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. . . . more
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February 28, 2008 01:25 AM EST --
An old couple goes to the doctor. The old man goes first to have his physical. When the doctor is done with him, he sends the old man back into the waiting room and calls the old woman in.
. . . more
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February 28, 2008 10:02 AM EST --
A story is told of a Jewish man who was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he . . . more
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February 29, 2008 10:18 AM EST --
Paddy goes to confession and says to the priest, "Bless me father, for I have sinned. It's been three weeks since my last confession, and in that time I have committed the sin of adultery." . . . more
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March 02, 2008 02:12 PM EST --
A local priest and a pastor were fishing on the side of the road. They thoughtfully made a sign saying, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around before it's too late!" and showed it to each . . . more
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January 19, 2008 01:29 PM EST --
A man who is an avid golfer finally gets a once-in-a-lifetime chance for an audience with the Pope. After standing in line for hours, he gets to the Pope and says, "Holiness, I have a question that . . . more
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July 09, 2008 10:29 AM EDT --
• Tech Support: "What version of the Mac OS are you using?"
Customer: "Word 6.0." • Tech Support: "What browser are you using, Netscape or Microsoft?"
Customer: . . . more
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February 14, 2008 06:40 AM EST --
An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with thelevel of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. Afterawhile, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, . . . more
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February 14, 2008 06:51 AM EST --
A man goes to see his Rabbi.
"Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talkto you about it."
The Rabbi asks, "What's wrong?" . . . more
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